Night of the Crabs (Crabs Series)

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Personally, I cry bullshit on this. When you’re a teenager, sure, a strong wind is enough to have you facing north. However, as a 40 year old guy, I can assure you that these things no longer happen “accidentally” and NEVER…NEVER without the owner’s awareness, let alone consent. Cliff Davenport turned to the pilot. The Professor’s face was lined and haggard. But he was smiling.

Night of the Crabs (Short 2019) - IMDb Night of the Crabs (Short 2019) - IMDb

The last 4 categories all have to do with the writing itself starting with some descriptions I just found stupid. Not campy fun, just dumb. Now I admit that I am no expert on Crabs Of Unusual Size or C.O.U.S. (*nods to Princess Bride for the assist*), but the following descriptions of the mega critters just didn’t work for me:and this will have to be self-regulated. if you see the cover or the premise for this and your first thought isn't "i must have this," then it is not for you. this is not for people on the fence about giant crabs. this is for the people it is for. you know who you are. Plus, a small army of soldiers and military types who neither kill any crabs nor mount Ms. du Brunner. Basically, they are worthless cannon fodder and serve the same role as the nameless “red shirts” in a Star Trek away mission. These are not just ordinary giant crabs with glowing red eyes. Their shells are bullet-proof. And tank-proof. And fire-proof. And they have a leader. And the leader has a plan!

Night Of The Crabs (1976) DLS Reviews - Night Of The Crabs (1976)

But although he has undoubtedly left an indelible mark on the Giant Crabs Invading Wales genre, one that will probably never be matched by any other author, I think all his subsequent work must inevitably fall short of the sparse brilliance of Night of the Crabs. That particular scene ends with Cliff exclaiming “we must still keep an eye open for those crabs” which is probably one of those things you’re not supposed to say during sex. For pulp horror fans, splatter-punk enthusiasts, and all lovers of Guy N Smith’s other work, this novel is so much of a must that you should stop reading this review now and grab yourself a copy this very second. I'm not sure if it was an editing issue, or if the original text was messed up, but there are a lot of weird things going on in the Kindle edition with exclamation points, capitalized letters in the middle of sentences and other things like that. In one scene a giant crab eats a japanese pirate while his entire crew watches, snapping off one limb at a time. Woooo! CRABS! In another scene a drunk guy is standing on the beach, laughing drunkenly at the severed head of a guy he knows bobbing in the waves, when all of a sudden a CRAB drags him underwater and EATS HIM.

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Cliff rolled in between her open legs. She still had a grip on his hardness and now she was guiding it down where she wanted it, bathing it first in her warm river of desire and then sliding it down further until it disappeared inch by inch into her.

Night of the Crabs - Google Books Night of the Crabs - Google Books

And since Roger Corman delivered the signature statement regarding giant crabs in 1957, few authors would have dared to try adding to this illustrious canon.The novel’s virtues are in its fast moving story and easy to read prose (this doesn’t mean the writing is especially good, mind you!). But as a gorefest the book is a disappointment, and as a monster mash only marginally satisfying. I can only hope those problems are ironed out in the subsequent CRABS novels, as I like my trashy fiction heavy on the trash, dammit! Mich kriegt ihr jedenfalls nicht, ihr verdammten Viecher, nicht in meiner BADEWANNE, dem sichersten Badeort der Welt, wo ich KILLER CRABS begonnen habe, und nicht eben dort, wo ich das Buch unter lautem Triumphgeheul beende! In addition to “DE”, it looks like Klin was also suffering from a mild form of PRIAPISM. I'm not sure how else to explain a 40+ year old man, alone on the water experiencing random stiffness: “He cursed as he suddenly became aware of a hardness, and a protrusion in the front of his shorts.” There!” Cliff had spotted another movement amongst the waves. “Something’s…Oh, my God! Just look at that one!”